Freedom to fail

Success is not built on success. It’s built on failure. It’s built on frustration. Sometimes it’s built on catastrophe – Sumner Redstone

Alittle distraction is the magical ingredient and we all need a pinch of it. Consistence without a disruption is simply a routine, disruption means moving from the status quo to the cutting edge.

No one has life all figured out, we all fail at something. That’s just the way it is

The secret to success is making the right decision, you only make the right decision when you’re experienced and experience comes from failing time and over!

In the beginning, you have to be bold enough to suck at something new. Listen it’s your first time, or second or third, I don’t know how long it’s going to take you but one thing is obvious, you’re most likely to fail a couple of times before finally figuring out how to do it right. And so, you have to be okay with failing.

Failure is not a sign of stupidity but lack of experience and skill.

How do you gain experience? By going over something again and again. And that means refusing to give up at it until you win. Be persistent!

Colonel sanders recipe was rejected 1009 times! If he gave up there would be no Kentucky fried chicken. Jeff Bezos’s online store ‘zshops” ultimately failed, if he had given up there would be no Amazon. Walt Disney’ s theme park concept was trashed 302 times, if He had quit there would be no Disney land. Howald Schultz was turned down by the banks 242 times, there would be no Starbucks if he accepted failure on the two hundred fouty secondth time.

“Facebook wasn’t the first thing I built, I also built chat systems and games, study tools and music players. And l am not alone JK Rowling was rejected 12 times before she finally wrote and published Harry Potter, even Beyonce had to make hundreds of songs to get Halo.

The greatest successes come from having the freedom to fail. And I think people ask what mistakes should you avoid making, and my answer to that question is don’t even try to avoid making mistakes, because you are gonna make tons of mistakes and the important thing is actually learning quickly from whatever mistake you make and not giving up!

There are things every single year of Facebook’s existence that could have killed us or made it so that it just seemed like moving forward and making alot of progress just seemed intractable, but you just kind of bounce back and you learn, nothing is impossible, you just have to keep running through the walls” Mark zuckerberg

Nothing can stop you, if you don’t stop for nothing!!

Shad 🖤


Heavenly Habit

I recently started on the #100squats30daysChallenge, a few days into my routine I decided to share with my contacts on whatsApp. When I started to exercise last year it was mostly because of the influence of my boyfriend, he just holds this much power over me.. Always pushing me to do more and become more in the best way ofcourse! When he asked me what kind of exercises I do, I proudly told him “the breathing exercises” you know that type where you just sit around and breath in and breath out real slow😂 ( I am kind of a lazy human being, they were working great though, the tension in my chest had greatly subsized) and then he had promised to drag me to the gym when he returns from working far abroad, but all he did was squeeze air out of muscles with his hugs🙄

Also my “dermatologist” in quotes because he is just really my friend who makes lotions, cleansers, toners and knows quite alot about skin had mentioned that sweating is a good way to unblock my pores, allow air passage and in turn have better skin, and so I did a few jumps here and there, sweat a little and didnot go for the next God knows how long. My issue was simple, i didn’t want to lose weight! You see, initially I thought exercises where for people who want to lose or gain weight, clearly I wanted neither! And I didn’t even bother to read more on the subject, I didn’t have a strong “why”

Fortunately I got my “why” when I started to feel pain around my pelvic area, when I coughed or snizzed I felt like my reproductive system would fall out any minute.. this came after my second vaginitis treatment in two months! I remember thinking this is it, the side effects from drugs is after my life, and somehow I got my phone and searched for all the possible causes of this pain, I found tons of info but most importantly was the exercise to strengthen my pelvic floor, kegels seemed alot easier for my lazy self, I read alittle more on how to do them properly, began just like that and three days down the road the pain was history.

From that day forth, exercising has become a part of me, it’s the best part on my morning routine.. and here is a few more things I learnt that pushed me even further into this heavenly habit;

🌸Improves character and will power, exercise happens to be run on these principles; remembering to breath, taking it slow, enduring the pain, pushing yourself and not giving up until you reach your set goal. If such principles are practised continuously it builds inner strength and new levels of determination which can help you a great deal in day to day life

🌸You’ll look and feel younger, exercising is the fountain of youth, it doesn’t stop the clock but it will sure slow it down, when you exercise you are infusing energy levels, you’ll look and feel younger and most importantly be healthier

🌸Provides a natural high, feeling moody or crampy? are you looking to feel good without side effects you’d get from things like drugs, alcohol, sex or eating carbs? then work out! When you exercise endorphins are released into your body, creating a positive europhic feeling

Exercising is one of the fastest way and most effective ways to clear stress hormones from the body, it will help you calm and relax, several studies suggest that being physically active should be recommended for any treatment plan for depression

🌸Boosts confidence, working out makes you feel fit, you gain strength and a sense of accomplishment. That rush has an effect on everything you do, when you feel better, you look better, you feel more confident and a great sense of empowerment. And we all know confidence is one of the sexiest trait one can possess

🌸You’ll have better sex, on top of confidence ladies do you know that exercises like kegel and squats can tighten your vagina, working out can also boost testerone levels which will increase your energy, mood and sex drive.

🌸Improves cognitive function and memory, keeping your body in shape helps keep your neurons in shape, even going for a walk at a moderate pace can improve reasoning, memory, attention span and the expansion of knowledge

🌸You’ll feel more energetic, if you are always feeling exhausted all the time, exercise may be your answer. Drag yourself out of bed and fit a work out first thing in the morning. You’ll immediately feel an energy surge that can carry you through the rest of the day

🌸You’ll sleep better, helps you keep your cardiac rhythm in check. Plan your work out during day and avoid doing it too close to your bed time.

🌸It helps you tap into creativity, studies have shown that creative thinking is improved by walking, so take a stroll, inside or out. Bring your phone so you can record ideas with out missing a step

🌸Strengthens bones and muscles, by the time we are in our 30s we have reached peak bone muscle mass. By our 40s we begin to lose it. With proper nutrition and regular exercise we can slow or even reverse this process. Keeping bones and muscles helps you stay more aerobically fit and lean, what’s more is it can reduce your risk of osteoporosis

🌸Helps balance the body’s PH, in response to exercise, the body increases its breathing rate which helps to counteract the PH-lowering effects by removing CO2, a component of the principle PH buffer in the blood.

And those are some of the reasons “why” you should fit in a work out on your daily routine

Note; some of this work was from notes I kept from a blog that I couldn’t remember, whoever it was from.. I hope your work can reach and impact people in the right way.


Your Purpose is the Plan …

What is your contribution to the world?

One of the greatest speaker and influencers of Islam visited my country in June of this year, my schedule was tight but the truth is we always make time for what’s important, i simply decided not to go for this seminar and my reasons were valid🙈 I hate to justify but almost every person I know was set to attend and picturing the crowd made me skeptical, I always get overwhelmed around so many people, such a lil heart for a brave girl 😂 it rained that same morning, and knowing it was gonna be filmed and I would get the message anyway made me sit firm on my butt ( am not so proud of myself)

You know how Islam is supposedly the tough religion of hard core virtues which is very strict and difficult to understand? Well, Mufti Menk is the sugar to the tea, the way he teaches is in my opinion the best👍 may Allah reward him for his contribution to the world.

Before the big seminar at Namboole stadium, mufti Menk had led the surmon on a Friday at Gaddafi mosque and he said some beautiful words ( anything to do with purpose and serving other people is bond to get my attention) and now I would love to share with every one; 👇

Dont waste your time, be productive! My beloved youth in this beautiful country of Uganda and across the globe, use your energies in the right direction, go out and volunteer for a good cause, spend your time and effort, your energies and resources to serve humanity, to serve Allah by serving humanity. Go out and help the widows and orphans solely for the pleasure of Allah and assist in the cause of those who are struggling… Use your tongue productivity and do something constructive, benefit yourself increase yourself in education, serve your nation and develop it in a positive way, dont be a liability rather be an asset may Allah grant us the ability to be assets to our communities, societies and our nations.

We have the energies, the resources, we have the brains, we have the opportunities and if you dont have an opportunity, don’t sit back and say “I don’t have an opportunity” create the opportunity, by the help of Allah it will work

Allah says don’t waste your time on futile discussion, when you pass by that that is irrelevant, un necessary, that which is a waste of time.. You should pass it with honor, let it pass!

I am not going to be part of people who are creating disunity, people who are creating hatred, people who are wasting time, because I am the worshipper of the most merciful, to get His mercy I WILL REACH OUT TO OTHERS those that are sick, have you visited them? have you prayed for them? You will find Allah when you assist them, you will find the mercy of Allah, that is the plan of Allah 🌸 – Mufti Menk

Thanks for reading, stay blessed #muchlove ♥️

Be a guide, not a judge!

We see the world, not as it is, but as we are!

We grow up in different homes, areas, countries, we are raised by different people with different cultures, norms and values, we go to different schools and have different experiences. Like it or not we all see the world differently, what you know, what seems obvious, normal, or comes natural to you might not be the same for the next person, we need to stop assuming that everyone knows what we know, or that what is right and makes sense to us does for everyone else.

I heard the story of a strange man who came to the mosque where the prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was seated with his sahabas, he walked to one corner and started to pee, in rage and disgust some of the sahabas got up and tried to stop him but the prophet intervened, he let the man finish peeing and then asked the swahabs to clean the place up, he took the man aside talked to him politely and explained to him why he shouldn’t be peeing in the mosque. This man was amazed by the way he was treated and he decided to convert to Islam. When the sahabas asked the prophet why he had handled him that way he told them, if they grabbed that man while peeing it would have splashed all over and they would have to clean the entire mosque rather than just the corner. And then, asked the sahabas why they assumed that this man definitely knows that he doesn’t have to pee in the mosque, he encouraged them to always take things slow and treat people in the best manner possible!

Every one sees the dirt in a person, be the one that sees gold!

Photo from shutterstock

All the time, everywhere…. do onto others as you would love others to do onto you! Would you like to be criticised, condemned and judged? then why do you do it to others? From the book, how to win friends and influence people.. I got the quote, “any fool can cricitise, condemn and complain, and most fools do but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving” the secret to healthy relations is to develop the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle or perspective.

Everyone has a reason why they do what they do, i repeat everyone has a reason why they do what they do! Now the problem is not what they do, it’s the why.. and i think we all agree that criticizing and complaining does not change much in an individual’s behavioral patterns, infact the more you complain the worse it gets! And that is why we have to instead do the hard stuff of trying to understand and figure out the reason why they do what they do, that is alot more profitable and intriguing.

Now, this is the real deal… regardless of who we are and where we come from, we want all to feel important! We all long to be loved, appreciated, seen, heard, understood, supported, cared for, recognized, praised, celebrated.. ..everyone wants to feel like they are special! Anytime someone falls short of this you’ll be suprised to what extremes they are willing to go to get the attention. When people feel un loved, neglected, worthless, un important they react in different ways, their actions is the effect of their circumstances!

This is not an easy talk to walk, i mean how can I appreciate someone I would rather choke to death? Refraining from judgements requires growth, time, energy, unselfishness and thoughtfulness! Are you perfect? haven’t you ever hurt somebody before? do you mean to say you have never done no wrong in this world? I don’t have to be so smart to know that’s impossible! but you had your reasons, right? and you know you want to be understood and forgiven, that, that is what everyone needs, but some of us have to go out of our way and give it first.

A little love, kindness, word of encouragement, appreciation, a sincere praise even to people who we think don’t deserve it, goes a long way! You can tame a monster by handling it with care, by speaking politely, by being patient and understanding, by listening attentively, by taking things slow. Build some one, remind them of their worth.

I may not know you! But I know that no one is entirely bad, like no body is 💯 good. You may have done some bad things in the past but they don’t define you, as you have done good as well, but its all forgotten too soon. I dont care what they have labeled you, its not your truth! It’s not who you are! You’re not a junkie, you’re not a whore, you’re not a thief, you’re not a murderer… that is simply a definition of your mistake, now you, your a human being who made a mistake and guess what? We all do! But there are sinners out here who blame other sinners for sinning differently, don’t mind them because every time they point at you four of their figures point back at them. You’re capable of doing great things, you can make the world a better place, believe me you have the power to forgive yourself, forgive everyone else, become a better person and live the most beautiful and fulfilling life, one step at a time — ezee shad ❤️🤗

The magic is in the mess

I love to sit outside and do some breathing exercises before I go to bed, and last night was no different. A few minutes into my regime I looked up at the sky, and there where a few stars, one shined brighter than the rest, i asked myself.. “why are there stars in the sky, why are they few, what is their purpose and why does one shine brighter than the rest?” after beating my head for sometime I figured that may be the star shinning brighter is meant to inspire the other stars so when they come back the next night they shine a little more, they are few because it takes courage to be up there, and their purpose must be to brighten up the world. I could be wrong but for now am content with my findings.

Away from the stars I reflected on my own life, I realised I have messed up alot, but ahem the mess is my driving force! “If it wasn’t that I’ve got to fix this and that, i would be in my bed sleeping like a baby” but where is the fun in that🤔 I remember thinking to myself. What would be the whole point of getting up and trying to be a better person every day if everything was fairly. And so thank you God for these challenges🙏 I’ve come up to speed with the fact that every mistake, every failure, every loss, every hardship is not a punishment but a blessing…tell me, how else can we grow? Look back at that tradegy, see how it made you better, wiser, more confident, stronger, may be softer and more compassionate or more grateful, or it might have put you closer towards your destiny. Oh, Or may be it made you bitter and angry but it wasn’t supposed to!

Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries with it a seed of an equal or greater benefit – Napoleon Hill

Embrace challenges! They are your little sweet hearts, Tiffany malott once said, “God doesnot give small battles to big soilders” you can tell the size of a man by the size of the things that make him mad, recognize that hardships are not meant to pull you down but it’s the test before you elevate on another level, so when your faced with challenges, rub your hands together, bite your lips and be like, “okay this is what I’ve been presented with? Great, am up for the challenge now let’s go to work” 💪 because challenges are a sign that new levels are on the way, be excited!

No man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity, fore he is not permitted to prove himself

Life will fuck you whether you like or not, it’s your choice… to take it as fun or rape! When it hurts observe, pay attention life is trying to teach you something, learn fast so you can move on to the next thing. The truth is we all fall, my prayer is that we lay among the few that have the courage to fight and never give up.! Just like the stars in the night, I hope that we shine so bright for the world to see and most importantly may we inspire the dulled up stars to illuminate✨

Shad ⭐🖤

When I wake up…..

Be careful, the devil hears your prayers too! He does not always come with horns and pitchfork sometimes he comes dressed up as everything you ever wanted👿

If I have to make a mistake, it shouldn’t be in the choice of a life partner! I think at a certain age, you’re like a ripe mango by the road side, every one is seeing you, reaching out, trying to grab you and eat you up! But I don’t want to just be bitten into, I want someone who is going to carefully rip off the peels, and love me naked! Don’t we all want that? I know we all want someone who just doesn’t like the physical but falls in love with the soul, mind, heart and all the flaws and imperfections that come with it because you can try, but no one is perfect. So, how much of me does he love? the whole package! Or he thinks love is a buffet where he can just take the parts of me he likes and not deal with others? He better love the good, the bad and everything in between. No devil’s advocate is up to such!

We like because and we love despite! Most of these potential suitors just want to eat the fruit and then throw away the seed. I met my cousin’s boyfriend through work, and we became hard on friends he talks to me literally about everything .. Now my cousin is a typical mess, yes! She is messed up big time, I think she is the hardest person to love on earth but her boyfriend keeps telling me, “I love her no matter what!” that is love! Everything else is bullshit. I think love is nurturing, taking things slow, gradually building someone into something better, knowing that they can be the most annoying person but you love them anyway! It’s patience, I know Jay said love is not tolerance but it is, you have to over look somethings and compromise for the greater good. You have to be willing to sacrifice and understand and grow together with someone. “yes, am a piece of work, and so are you and everyone else… Do you love me anyway? am slippery I know, show me how to trust you, teach me how to stay. Does he love me despite? Problem is some people want to have the best relationship but they are not willing to invest in them.

I think what am trying to get to here is, he is tall, he is cute, he works a nice job and he drives a big car so what? that’s the icing, what’s the cake? I’ve met a couple of men like that, what is your catch? What makes you different from the crowd? I think these are questions we need to ask ourselves before we settle down. Because any man can take you dinning to fancy restaurants, any man can take you shopping, any man can call you, text, and leave flowers at your desk…. But not just any man will support and appreciate you, you can’t just sit down and have a descent conversation with any man, not every man will be honest with you, every Tom, Dick and Harry won’t understand you, not everyone will take time off to learn you and love you in your love language, not every man has you on their vision boards, you are no where included in the future plans of most of these men, does he make you a better human? Do you feel more of yourself around them or further lost? Do you feel at peace? Do they bring light into the darkness? If one look at them doesn’t make you meet with your inner self, they probably not the one, anyone can give you goosebumps the real one will set your soul on fire.

You can’t always listen to your mind, sometimes our observations are wrong, and our judgement is usually clouded by our emotions you can’t count on the heart either, and so our strongest weapon is prayer! Much as God wants someone for us he also gave us a free will, “A” might be your perfect match but may be you ain’t spiritually, mentally or emotionally grown enough to realise it so you go for “B” because he makes so much sense in this very moment or may be because the devil has set him up for you and he “does and looks like every thing you want” only to wake to a shock a few years down the road.

That’s how I took my confusion to the mosque on Friday a few months back! I prayed two rakas before juma and asked God to show me whose from Him. In my head I had considerations ofcourse, “is it A or B?” A few minutes into the surmon the girl on my right called on to the girl on my left but it was a male name, the same name of a man I had broken up with a few months back, i was shocked, and disappointed! I wanted it to be “A” or “B” or someone I never met and so, “no no no God it better not be that one” I cried out in my head, then convinced myself it’s just a coincidence not a sign from Allah😂 it’s definitely not him, God can’t punish me like that! I reassured myself. i had completely given up on him, I didn’t want to have anything to do with him, and so I asked for more signs but they all still pointed at the same man, I wasn’t happy with the signs then, but i accepted it, my emotions are my weakness, so the devil must use it alot! Because he is not perfect I admit, he gives me alot of headache but this is the same man who supports me, appreciates me, encourages me to better person, but as soon a few misunderstandings rouse up I had thrown in the towel without a fight

The whole point is, we need spiritual guidance in finding our soul mates because sometimes what it looks like is not what it is! The man calling you every hour and replying fast, and doing everything you want might be a trap to divert you from the right man who is actually trying but your too blind to see because of the many distructions. What’s the hurry for? Marriage is a life time don’t rush through the process! Take things slow, one step at a time! Lucky are those who marry their best friends, people they know inside out, but there is no luck, they just actually work to achieve this! And we all can do this.. Be honest, respectful, royal, trustworthy, accept someone the way they are and never judge them.

It’s better to wait long, than marry wrong!


Conventional western medicine does not see a body as a whole unit organism, is rather seen as different body parts and treated as such without taking into consideration the fact that these body parts are coordinated as one whole unit. This is what distinguishes western medicine.

In western medicine we simply fight with an illness by all means and methods at our disposal – the surgical knife, chemistry, radiation etc it usually turns out well in acute and urgent cares, but unfortunately found to be non effective when it’s about chloronic diseases/illnesses, rehabilitation, and so if we are aiming at preventation of an illness or health preservation.

Eastern medicine has a different approach, it says an illness is a signal that something is wrong in the human organism and the aim is not to fight the illness but to restore health in other words Eastern medicine removes the cause of the ailment.The fact is when you took a tablet you lowered the blood pressure but you didn’t remove the cause of the ailment. You removed the headache, but what caused it?! The headache is the body’s way of saying that there is a problem here, do pay attention as tomorrow may be too late” unfortunately we donot pay serious attention until things have started to get out of hand.

In China they dont have organ specialist doctors like in the western medicine. Their doctors treat the whole organism. As a result they by far have a longer average life expectancy than the rest of us here in the west. Their infant mortality rate stands at 3% while ours is whopping a 37%. Today around the world diseases and ailments seen to be winning the war but we can reverse the trend by shifting the emphasis towards health restoration.

For this very reason in 1999 in Havard (USA) the institute of integrated medicine was formed as a bounding of western and eastern medicine. The more we make pharmaceutical drugs, the more refined Forms of illnesses are taking these days. The staphylococcus which penicillin once successfully dealt with now has become such that even the most powerful antibiotics cannot control anymore. Most likely that is why there is growth in autoimmune conditions, help the organism survive and not choke it with ecology, chemistry and stress

In eastern medicine we believe you are what you eat, and what you eat is your medicine!

Eastern medicine takes time, inorder to get results you need to take the medicine for a longer period of time and straight away warn those who are set for “today a sip and tomorrow results” this will not happen. My advise is if you want quick fix you may need to turn fully to western medicine for help.

The foundation for restoring help is Cleansing, there are always remainder left all around the body which eventually builds up traits of toxins, cleansing therefore is the removal of these waste products from the body….

I personally use and recommend lipid metabolism management tea. (ingredients; green tea, leaves of gynostemma, lotus leaves, Chinese knotweed root, and semen cassia.) maintain atleast once a year regime of this.

Some of the health benefits of this tea;

  • Reduce the risk of cancer
  • Fights skin allegies
  • Anti aging
  • Prevents high blood sugar
  • Prevents liver, kidney and heart diseases
  • Prevents asthma, arthritis
  • Prevents obesity
  • Helps boost the immune system
  • Helps lower cholesterol
  • Helps keep the bone strong
  • Eliminates free radicals
  • Gives energy and more…….

We need to correct the foundation first, so that brick by brick we can rebuild a strong system again…

Creds to Farida Bikbaeva

Thanks for reading, shad🤗💕

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